Tuesday, January 26, 2010


You may have heard of all the 'love language' stuff after a book by Gary Chapman became very popular both in churches and out. In some of the circles I am in, it was common (and still is) to be asked what your love language is during a get-to-know you type conversation. . . and I've always felt uneasy answering. If you say my primary love language is gifts, especially to someone who's love language isn't gifts. . . it sounds selfish or materialistic (at least to my ears). I don't want people to feel like I'll only feel loved by you if you give me stuff. And truth be told. . . there are other love languages, and we all feel loved by all of them. My husband is not a big gifter. . . giving or receiving . . . but I sure as heck feel loved by him. :)

I think it comes from my mom. My mom is a great gift giver. She loves LOVES thinking of things to give. She is creative in her gift giving and gives things you didn't remember or realize you wanted but when you receive her gift you feel known. I have other people in my life who are the same way, from close friends to my step-mom too. . . I have a lot of gifters in my life. I'm one too.

My birthday was a couple of weeks ago and I received some great gifts from family and friends. Some really great gifts. None huge or super flashy expensive or anything like that, but as I opened them each on different occasions. . . I felt known. When you receive a gift you didn't ask for, that so perfectly meets a need or fits inside of your taste you feel known. And that, I decided, is why my love language is gifts. Because giving a gift that makes someone else feel known, is a priceless feeling. It's not about stuff.

1 comment:

  1. Don't you like how your book is in Japanese. Hmm, well I thought it was mostly a picture book so it was okay.